It all started on Tuesday of last week. A baggage packing frenzy occurred in the Bargoz-Tedeschi-Tedeschi household that morning and then suddenly we were off to the airport. We left our home an absurd 4 1/2 hours before our flight was scheduled to take off. I thought that was awfully excessive on the part of M & D. I'm just a baby. How hard did M & D think it would be to get me through security?
Turns out, O'Hare was a breeze. We checked our bags, flew through security and battled it out with the other baby on the flight to get the only bassinet on the airplane (that baby and her mom didn't stand a chance against my mommy's military tactics). I must note that the airplane bassinet basket is a pretty clever invention. It's a little metal-framed bassinet that attaches to and is suspended from the bulkhead. Ingenuity aside, I didn't want anything to do with that bassinet. It's bad enough I didn't get my own seat. Did they really think I would fall asleep in that old dirty basket which I am sure was manufactured in the 1970s? No thanks. I spent the entirety of the flight in M & D's arms, which means they didn't sleep very well, but who can sleep on an overnight flight crossing the Atlantic anyway? Mommy and I also experienced a traumatizing but necessary in-flight diaper change which I will not elaborate further on.
In France, M & D had their brightest idea yet (and I say "brightest" with the highest degree of sarcasm fathomable). They decided to rent a car with a manual transmission (i.e. - a stick shift) knowing full well that neither of them knew how to drive stick. Daddy watched a couple of YouTube videos on it and mommy read a Wikihow article on the flight. Really, folks? These are the people who are supposed to teach and guide me in life?
Well, it's a good thing I slept through the entire hour-long drive from the Marseilles airport to our home in Saint-Remy-de-Provence. Mommy told me about it afterwards and, albeit hilarious, it wasn't pretty.
Daddy drove and things were initially going pretty well.. until we stalled out at our first toll booth... about 8 times... before we even made it up to the ticket machine. He had to turn his hazard lights on because a crowd of cars accumulated behind him as we were struggling to inch forward. After we finally made it up to the machine - ticket in hand and barrier gate up - we stalled another several times trying to pull past the gate.
From there, things were again going well... until the second toll booth. Same story: stalled out over and over again just getting to the machine. Hazard lights on. Then, when we reached to the machine, M & D realized they couldn't pay the toll because they only had 100 Euro bills and no small change. (Again, these people are supposed to be my role models in life?) When a human being finally came to our aid, Daddy had to reach his entire body out of the driver's side window to hand the lady our money because the booth was 3 feet in front of him and he couldn't inch the car close enough to her without stalling.
Then came the pinnacle of our drive in. We finally made it to town and were about 5 minutes from our home when we stalled out in the middle of an intersection. With so many people honking behind him and the pressure really on, Daddy lost his cool and couldn't get the car going again without stalling out... over and over and over and over and over again... until two French men got out of their cars and physically pushed our car out of the middle of the intersection. Daddy was sure there was something wrong with the car. Which, in fact, was not the case. Daddy eventually regained his composure and confidence and was able to get the car going again.
We finally made it safely to our very French, very charming cottage (three bedrooms, immensely stocked kitchen, jacuzzi tub, fireplace, terrace with enclosed stone grill), which is located within a little hamlet of remodeled and modernized farm houses owned by a lovely Chicago native named William. William and his staff had a home cooked dinner (and more importantly for M & D after the drive in, a couple bottles of wine) waiting for us upon our arrival. And they brought us fresh baked croissants and pain au chocolat in the mornings.
We arrived on Wednesday of last week. On Thursday, we explored our little town of Saint-Remy-de-Provence and got our bearings, followed by dinner on our terrace. On Friday, we visited an ancient Roman aqueduct called the Pont du Gard. On Saturday, we drove down to a beautiful town on the Mediterranean called Cassis and took a boat ride along the "Calanques du Cassis," which are little creeks carved into the massive cliffs lining the ocean. On our way home, we stopped at a lookout point where I got my first (of many) "roadie" diaper changes in the back of the car. Daddy's gotten pretty good at the roadie diaper change. Mommy, on the other hand, can't handle them because they offend her type-A (i.e., control freak) sensibilities.
More on the rest of the trip later. Until then, I leave you with some (rather, a lot of) pictures from the first several days.
Love,
WFT
Daddy drove and things were initially going pretty well.. until we stalled out at our first toll booth... about 8 times... before we even made it up to the ticket machine. He had to turn his hazard lights on because a crowd of cars accumulated behind him as we were struggling to inch forward. After we finally made it up to the machine - ticket in hand and barrier gate up - we stalled another several times trying to pull past the gate.
From there, things were again going well... until the second toll booth. Same story: stalled out over and over again just getting to the machine. Hazard lights on. Then, when we reached to the machine, M & D realized they couldn't pay the toll because they only had 100 Euro bills and no small change. (Again, these people are supposed to be my role models in life?) When a human being finally came to our aid, Daddy had to reach his entire body out of the driver's side window to hand the lady our money because the booth was 3 feet in front of him and he couldn't inch the car close enough to her without stalling.
Then came the pinnacle of our drive in. We finally made it to town and were about 5 minutes from our home when we stalled out in the middle of an intersection. With so many people honking behind him and the pressure really on, Daddy lost his cool and couldn't get the car going again without stalling out... over and over and over and over and over again... until two French men got out of their cars and physically pushed our car out of the middle of the intersection. Daddy was sure there was something wrong with the car. Which, in fact, was not the case. Daddy eventually regained his composure and confidence and was able to get the car going again.
We finally made it safely to our very French, very charming cottage (three bedrooms, immensely stocked kitchen, jacuzzi tub, fireplace, terrace with enclosed stone grill), which is located within a little hamlet of remodeled and modernized farm houses owned by a lovely Chicago native named William. William and his staff had a home cooked dinner (and more importantly for M & D after the drive in, a couple bottles of wine) waiting for us upon our arrival. And they brought us fresh baked croissants and pain au chocolat in the mornings.
We arrived on Wednesday of last week. On Thursday, we explored our little town of Saint-Remy-de-Provence and got our bearings, followed by dinner on our terrace. On Friday, we visited an ancient Roman aqueduct called the Pont du Gard. On Saturday, we drove down to a beautiful town on the Mediterranean called Cassis and took a boat ride along the "Calanques du Cassis," which are little creeks carved into the massive cliffs lining the ocean. On our way home, we stopped at a lookout point where I got my first (of many) "roadie" diaper changes in the back of the car. Daddy's gotten pretty good at the roadie diaper change. Mommy, on the other hand, can't handle them because they offend her type-A (i.e., control freak) sensibilities.
More on the rest of the trip later. Until then, I leave you with some (rather, a lot of) pictures from the first several days.
Love,
WFT
No comments:
Post a Comment